That's Enough, Casper

Those crazy but lovable Christians are at it again, this time casting out homosexual “spirits” from young men. If you’re like me, you’re probably saying, “and…?” because this doesn’t even begin to top Christianity’s Greatest Hits, but it’s egregious nonetheless. At this point, I just shrug in response to every story I read about Christians trying to blow up a public library with cans of Great Value bug spray for daring to shelve Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. A headline that would really make me choke on my oatmeal would be “Christians Band Together to Help Others, Remain Nonjudgmental While Doing So.”

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This video comes from Manifested Glory Ministries (turn up the sound and get out your glow sticks if you really want a party on your hands) and they actually have a blog, if you can believe it. Its sole purpose is to, “create an Spiritual Interactive Community Website in the spirit of thy Lord Jesus Christ, for all of God’s children all across the world using the internet” which makes sense because–brace yourselves–THERE’S NO INTERNET IN HEAVEN, so may as well get your kicks while you still can.

Credit: Manifested Glory Ministries

Pictured proudly with her pimp, or Overseer as they refer to it, Prophetess Patricia McKinney looks exactly what you would imagine someone to look like who claims to have visions from the Lord where she witnesses the end times in which, “many people…died and fell into the lake of fire because of there Sins and wicked hearts never maken it acorss to the promise land…[sic].” She calls that being a prophet, and I agree, as long as “prophet” is code for “asshole.”

Like any good Christian, Patricia admits to a history of drug use, stating that, “…in 1994 the lord fully delivered me from heron and cocaine and alcohol I became clean…[sic]” However, like any good Christian, she is also a skilled liar, since a criminal search reports that she was in possession of cocaine in 1999. Of course, I could be wrong, but it doesn’t really matter if it’s 1994, 1999 or the day before yesterday. The very obvious point to be made here is that if someone tells you that, “you can’t be ordained as a prophet you have to be born a prophet, man cannot ordained you as a prophet only god can do that you must be born a prophet before the belly of the womb,” they are not only unaware that they are borderline illiterate, but that they are also completely full of shit.

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